I posted the above image on one of my Pinterest boards and very quickly it received a flurry of likes and re-pins…mostly from women. Interesting!
This got me thinking that perhaps being a lady is a lost art. I know plenty of women who prefer Mae West to Grace Kelly any day; the bawdy humor, the ironic air of superiority over men and the willingness to showcase themselves in an electric way.
I have experienced life from that vantage point, and while it was at times great fun and had it’s advantages; there is nothing I enjoy more than the loveliness and empowerment of being a lady.
It’s not something that came naturally to me. However, it has become a way of being I eagerly embrace.
First of all let me clear up some misconceptions…
What being a lady IS:
Feminine
Receptive
Spiritual
Feeling
Available
Respectful
What being a lady IS NOT:
Masculine
Giving
Cerebral
Thinking
Driving the train
Cherishing
But wait! You say… “I’m female and a giver and a deep thinker.”
I’m not questioning that, and I’m not saying these are bad qualities...but I’m afraid it doesn’t make you the feminine lady I’m talking about.
Hold on...before you unsubscribe, I challenge you to consider the truth in what I’m writing, and ask yourself if perhaps you could be happier in your life and relationships...
Are you with me?
When I say lady, I’m talking about a softness that we women often sacrifice when we focus on being all things to all people.
Especially with the men in our lives.
If you choose, ladies, to cherish your men you make them your children. When you require respect you are asking to be masculated and far from feminine. And, then we wonder why we don’t feel attractive.
By attractive, I’m talking an inner spark…a beautiful magnetic pull that attracts cherishing like bees to honey!
And here’s an a‑ha for you; when we feminine women are cherished, we feel respected and in turn loved. Conversely, when masculine men are respected they understand they are cherished and in turn loved.
One thing is for sure. We have the power to set the tone!
If you want to be cherished, consider not demanding to be respected. Rather practice your feminine self, and chances are it will flow to you naturally.
It took me literally decades to STOP bridging the gap between my expectations and what HE was/or wasn’t doing.
How many times had I identified a need, was sure to ask for it, then follow up, follow up again, and sometimes, just go ahead and do it myself! Nothing feminine or lady-like there.
I had no patience. I had no sense of respect or honor for my man’s timing. And I relied far too much on his actions to make me feel safe and secure.
Why did I need him to feel safe and secure? Ironically, not because I couldn’t take care of myself, but rather, I was so much in my masculine, I had all but disconnected from the power and strength of being grounded in the feminine woman I’m intended to be.
What’s the remedy?
1. Consider practicing some of the feminine traits I listed this week.
2. Treat your sweet self like a science experiment, and simply observe.
3. Notice what happens if you don’t automatically spring into action every time something doesn’t go as planned; practice not repeating, prompting or reminding.
Horrified at the thought? I get it!
Do the best you can and next week I’ll write about some of my tricks and tips for how to let things unfold...it’s the most amazing way to live!
Until then, I look forward to hearing your thoughts and experiences around your femininity. And if you have a specific scenario you want to run by me, I’m happy to share my experience and thoughts with you...
And remember, I am most definitely in your corner!
Love,
Thais